Blog for One

In my previous post I mentioned how my dad had been diagnosed with GBM stage 4 in early November 2010.

As of November 3rd he was told he had between 8 to 12 weeks to live without treatment, and that treatment would largely be ineffective.

54 days later, on December 27th, dad passed away on the same day he checked into a hospice.

Now, just over 2 months after his passing, I am starting to come to grips with what happened.

I will post something of my experience during that time later.

My dad is 83 years old, and the gentlest person I have ever known.

About a month ago, my mom was complaining that he seemed more forgetful every now and then. Two weeks ago, his family doc sent him for tests, suspecting a mild stroke or similar event.

Upon admission at the hospital, they took a CT scan of his head and noticed ‘masses’ of a non-specific nature. After 3 days of tests and waiting, we got him released for the weekend, and were back at the hospital for more tests last week.

They looked at his chest x-rays, they looked for exotic (really exotic) diseases and found nothing.

Then came November 3rd. After much pushing on our part we were able to get a consultation with a neurosurgeon. During the consultation, Dr M. performed some tests of my dad’s cognitive ability and I was in shock at what I was hearing.

Things went from bad to catastrophic quickly as the Dr then said without any hesitation “I know what your father has, he has a very aggressive brain tumor called Glioblastoma Multiforme – look, see here on my screen?” He then pointed out where the tumerous mass was on the CT Scan, “Here, here, and here. Based on your father’s age and the progression of the tumor, I estimate he has between 8 and 12 weeks without treatment – with treatment you would gain at best 2 months, but it will be worse for your father. This is a very aggressive cancer, and your father will not suffer.”

With those words, my entire world came to a screeching halt.

He’s been at home since the 3rd, and I have been with him daily.

This is the bleakest week in my life.

It’s been a long, complicated and generally tough year so I am glad to see 2009 come to a close.

2010 will be a year of change, restructuring, and resetting of priorities. A time to build or rebuild myself and my life.

Good-bye 2009 – you were a handful.

Randy Pausch

Randy Pausch died on July 25th of pancreatic cancer. His lecture from the Carnegie Mellon “Last Lecture” series was as inspirational as it was popular.